the competition.

The curtains are pulled back exposing the empty stage. I've never been one for competitions, but I didn't choose to be in this one. Four years ago I never would've imagined standing in the exact spot I'm in now.

There's only one judges seat. As years passed, he was always the only judge. Occasionally a new one would come in and join him, but they would never last very long. A week, maybe a month. Then they would move on. Quickly.

There was always only one other contestant. She'd always won, but here I was, with the same singing and dancing I'd been doing for years. I could sing and dance my way around that judge, but he wasn't interested. Even as I sang and dance, his eyes were on her. He'd glance in my direction every now and then, but would immediately realize she was better and his gaze would wander back to the one I knew he wanted.

He always knew exactly how to let me down. "You were winning at one point, there was something about you, but it stopped. You started losing and I went back to her. I'm sorry."

I'm like the beauty queen who can't accept she's lost. I'm scrambling for that trophy, attempting anything and everything to claw it out of her hands.

But in the end. I lose. I'm still losing.

I lose until I let go. Until I let go of him.

Then...I finally win.